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News Transcripts

05/24/24

Good morning! It’s Friday, May 24th.

Aviation Mechanic Technician Day.

Uh oh… who’s gonna tell em?

Don’t worry, it’s also carb day. Which I guess is a racing thing, but let me tell ya something… it’s also carb day for me. (Not racing. Just like… man how good is pizza?)

And now, the news.

 

Hurricane Season

-via CBS News

Let’s start with weather, which means it’s not good news because even though I am a noted weather-head, when I start with weather it’s not like “yay weather.” It’s like… uh oh. Sorry about this sorry…

The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (aka NOAA) predicts that this hurricane season, which begins June 1st, will be "above average" with 17 to 25 named storms, 8 to 13 hurricanes, and 4 to 7 major hurricanes of category 3 or higher.

An average season has 14 named storms, seven hurricanes, and three major hurricanes.

And listen, there’s really nothing to be done about it right now, ya know? It’s not like we can go back in time and stop using aerosol cans and turning on the air conditioning with the windows down…

So really this is just a good reminder that, if you live in an area where there are hurricanes, just make sure you have all the supplies you need now, while it’s early.

 

Stage Collapse in Mexico

-via AP News

In vaguely related weather news, heavy winds in northern Mexico caused a stage to collapse at a political campaign rally, killing at least nine, and injuring at least 121 others, on Wednesday night.

27 remain hospitalized, including some in critical condition.

 

Louisiana Goes First (In a Bad Way)

-via NY Times

Welp, Louisiana’s decision to make just the possession of the abortion pill punishable by jail has passed the State Senate. It now heads to the governor’s desk for signature, where he is excepted to scribble his little name on the little piece of paper that further denigrates the rights of anyone who can get pregnant.

Louisiana is the first state in the country to pass such a bill, though likely they will not be the last.

Hey you know something, it’s not always great to go first. Sometimes it’s because it’s actually a very bad idea.

 

Newsom Signs Abortion Bill for AZ Doctors

-via Politico

And yet again in vaguely related news (sometimes I really knock these outlines outta the park, ya know?) – Governor Newsom has signed a bill that allows some Arizona doctors to be temporarily licensed in California, allowing them to be able to perform abortions.

I was kind of “eh” about it when he first announced it last month, but now it’s a month later and you know… I’m still kinda “eh” about it.

It’s just not necessary. It’s a PR move more than anything else. Especially given that, for the few weeks that Arizona’s abortion ban will be in effect, the state’s AG says she will not enforce it. It may be enforced at a local level, but not at the state level.

But still, he’s positioning California to be a reproductive safe haven and so I guess that falls in line with that.

Arizona doctors will be able to perform abortions in California through November 30th, 2024.

 

DOJ v Ticketmaster-Live Nation

-via NBC News

And now for some good news…

The Department of Justice is looking to breakup the unholy matrimony that is Ticketmaster and Live Nation, a merger that has vexed live music fans through dynamic pricing, crashed websites, and truly insane fees that we all were forced to pay because they owned 60% of concert promotions at major venues and about 80% of ticketing operations through Ticketmaster.

Now, this is not going to be an immediate thing, unfortunately, but it’s a start at least.

 

SCOTUS Gives GOP Redistricting Win

-via NBC News and Axios

And let’s end with the Supreme Court.

Which we could just end the Supreme Court but hey… if wishes were horses…

On Thursday the high Court ruled that South Carolina did NOT unlawfully consider race when they drew a new congressional district that removed thousands of Black voters.

If I know one thing about South Carolina, I can assure you… they unlawfully consider race in just about anything they do.

The ruling will have no immediate effect on the state, though it will make future fair redistricting more difficult.

To which the judges were like “yeah!”

No no… but…

Actually, one Justice in particular did have something um… interesting… to say…

Because just a week after the 70th anniversary of the Brown versus Board of Education ruling that banned segregation in schools – historical badman Justice Thomas said, in his concurrence, that the Supreme Court took “a boundless view of equitable remedies” through “extravagant uses of judicial power” in their ruling.

He also said… federal courts should no longer hear racial gerrymandering claims: "I write separately to address whether our voting-rights precedents are faithful to the Constitution."

Are our voting-rights precedents faithful to the Constitution? No! Not the original one – and we are a better nation for it. To suggest that courts should no longer hear racial gerrymandering claims is chilling. Keep voting rights out your mouth Justice Thomas.

 

And that’s it. That’s news.

Because now I’m all fired about these dang voting rights! You know how I get!

I’m proud of carbs. Particularly the many many carbs I will inhale to erase the anger I currently feel. Just kidding… I eat the carbs to fuel me. To give me the energy to ask you one question…

Are you registerd to vote?

But more than carbs… more than an everything bagel… because you never have too many poppy seeds… I’m proud of you!

Kim Moffat