07/17/24

Good morning! It’s Wednesday, July 17th.

National Hot Dog Day!

And World Emoji Day.

World hot dog emoji day.

And now, the news.

Sen. Menendez Found Guilty

-via AP News

Finally, a crime that leads the news but doesn’t involve Trump! What a world!

New Jersey Senator Bob Menendez has been found guilty on all counts in his corruption trial that saw him accept bribes and act as a foreign agent for the Egyptian government while doing things like meeting with Egyptian intelligence officials and helping that country access millions of dollars in U.S. military aid.

Famously one the bribes included gold bars. Which I can’t not point out because… it’s funny. What he did is not good, but it is funny that entered into evidence were gold bars and cash stuffed into a jacket that was embroidered with his name.

You know the feeling when you put your hand in your pocket and you find a fiver and you think “today’s going to be a great day” and also “now where did this come from?”? Now imagine that feeling with like – hundreds of thousands of dollars.

The Senator maintains that he’s done nothing wrong and the gold bars were his wife’s. His wife has also been indicted but her trial has been delayed while she recovers from breast cancer surgery.

Breast cancer surgery! And Menendez is like – no those gold bars are hers for SURE!

What an interesting dynamic in that marriage.

The Senator is currently up for reelection, but Senator Schumer has already called for him to resign.

He will be sentenced in late October and faces up to twenty years in prison.

Democratic Presidential Ticket

-via NY Times

Something I haven’t really talked about a lot recently is the possibility of Biden being replaced on the ticket. I mentioned it last week, and then took the week off and haven’t talked about it since. But just wanted to note that that is still an active conversation.

Nothing has really happened, Biden still says he’s running, there is a group of Democrats still standing by their man as well as another group worried that Democrats will lose everything if Biden doesn’t drop out.

That group includes California Congressmember Adam Schiff, who, over the weekend, warned donors at a private party that Democrats will see an overwhelming loss in November if the President stays on the ticket.

Like I said last time I talked about this – this is news, for sure. But it’s also gossip. And we love gossip! But gossip is not news.

Who knows how this will shake out. It’s a complicated situation for sure. But just wanted to note that it’s still in the ether.

Leaked RFK/Trump Conversation

-via NPR

On Tuesday, RFK Jr’s son, Bobby Kennedy III “accidentally” posted a video of a conversation between RFJ Jr and Trump from over the weekend.

In the call, he talked about his concern over vaccines - "When you feed a baby, Bobby, a vaccination that is like 38 different vaccines, and it looks like it's meant for a horse, not a, you know, 10-pound or 20-pound baby."

A 20 pound baby! What on earth?

Also – 38 vaccines? To quote Ben Wyatt… “I don’t even have time to tell you how wrong you are. Actually it’s going to bug me if I don’t.”

According to the CDC, there are 19 recommended vaccines to be given between the ages of fresh new (20 pound!) baby and 18 years old.

It is recommended babies get the RSV vaccine, the 1st and 2nd Hep B doses, and varying doses of five other vaccines before they’re 6 months.

I mean, I’m no doctor, and this is not me telling you your baby’s schedule I’m just saying… the CDC has seven vaccines listed, plus Covid and the flu shot.

Counting that, that’s nine vaccines. Way less than 38. 38 vaccines is too high! And also, an invented number! And I don’t know who needs to hear this (besides the two guys on the phone) but no doctor in their right mind would be like, “This syringe, made to hold enough vaccine for a horse, is exactly right for your baby.”

If they do… you should leave that office. Because that’s a horse doctor. Or a horse dressed as a doctor.

Also, they don’t feed them vaccines. I know I’m too annoyed about this but the guy that thinks they feed 38, horse-level, vaccines to 20 pound babies is leading in the polls to be president and if anything I think we’re all being too chill about that.

On the call, Trump also said "I would love you to do something. And I think it'll be so good for you and so big for you. And we're going to win."

Not sure what that means but I don’t love it!

He said Saturday’s shooting felt, "like the world's largest mosquito,” and that President Biden’s call, “was very nice, actually."

It should be noted that President Biden did call Trump. Trump has still, that anyone is aware of, not called the family of the man who died at his rally, nor has he called or visited the others who were injured.

He went golfing on Sunday.

What a guy!

Cocaine Found in Banana Shipment

-via CBS News

And finally – more than six tons of cocaine were found hidden in a shipment of bananas traveling from Ecuador to Germany on Tuesday. Proving George Bluth Sr was right – there’s always money in the banana stand.

And that’s it. That’s the news.

I’m proud of… hot dog emojis. It’s a classic dog – just some yellow mustard. I was curious to see if this was a regional thing anywhere and it’s not, but in my search I was forced to see a lot of pictures of some fairly gross, to me, hot dog choices. And that’s how I spent part of my Tuesday evening.

I did this for you.

But more than hot dogs, because looking at hot dogs is the least of weird things I’ll do for you… I’m proud of you.