01/17/25

Good morning! It’s Friday, January 17th.

Benny Franks Day!

Benjamin Franklin, if you’re proper.

Hey here’s a fun fact about Benny… he was such an avid swimmer that he invented hand paddles to help propel him through the Charles River.

He was such an advocate for swimming, in fact, that he’s in the International Swimming Hall of Fame.

And now, the news.

Los Angeles Fires

-via ABC News

Starting with the fires in Los Angeles, which had yet another day of great news as the winds appear to be behind us for now.

The Palisades fire is ____ acres and ____ contained, while the Eaton fire is _____ acres and _____ contained.

Here’s something really neat… Thursday afternoon I got a National Weather Service frost advisory. Frost! After the heat.

What a time to be alive.

So, I want to say something about these fires. For now, they’re probably going to stop leading the news. Here on this show, and probably, eventually, others as well.

But that doesn’t mean the story is over.

Los Angeles will rebuild. Of course we will.

But for tens of thousands of Angelinos, even the idea of rebuilding feels like it’s a million miles away.

I’ll be keeping links to donate in show notes. If you have any capacity, please consider a donation. And if you can’t right now, keeping it on your radar. This rebuild is going to take a long time, and families are going to need your support for a long time.

If you can’t get out to volunteer this weekend – how about next weekend?

Time, money, influence… everything helps.

If you’re not here in LA, there are places to give from a distance.

And then… watch LA. Watch what we’re about to do. Watch this city come back.

Israel-Hamas Ceasefire Deal

-via NY Times

So it seems we were all a little too quick to report on the Israel-Hamas ceasefire deal. Because although both sides announced the deal, there were a few last minute disputes that are still being worked out.

We’re talking about hundreds and thousands of people who are starving. Getting sick from a lack of water or only being able being able to drink contaminated water.

So here’s hoping that I’ll have some good news on this deal in the next week’s episode. A new ceasefire vote will take place on Saturday.

TikTok Ban? Maybe?

-via NBC News

As you may, or not, be aware – for the last few months, TikTok, the incredibly popular social media app where I am just… could not be a bigger star… as we all know. I’m a mogul on TikTok. People are constantly just like – do more TikToks. Kim! Kim! Tok another Tik!

Anyway, enough about what an absolute beast I am on the app… that app has been a point of contention in Congress, who wants to shutter the app stateside, amidst concerns that the app’s data may be sent to the company’s home country of China and used against us.

Keeping TikTok available in the states has been an ongoing battle that came to a head last April, when Biden signed a law stating that TikTok needed to sell the majority of its stateside business to a person or company in America.

They came to me and I was like – Oooh. Would love to, but I’m not liquid right this second.

And beyond me, they haven’t had any serious buyers.

So now it’s January 17th and the app is supposed to be banned beginning on the 19th, or companies that provide access to the app, like Apple or Google’s Alphabet, would see finds in the hundreds of billions of dollars.

But fear not, because President Biden has announced that he will not be fining companies who allow access to the app after the 19th.

So now it’s up to Trump to decide what he wants to do about it.

Trump originally wanted to ban the app, but now says it helped him win the election (untrue. Kamala Harris won 54% of the share of voters under 30.)

So we’ll see what happens here but, for now, the app will live to see another trending sound. (If you’re not on TikTok, that made no sense. If you are on TikTok… that joke LANDED.)

Rudy Guiliani

-via AP News

Judy Ruliani! (If you’re new here, my stepdad once called Rudy Guiliani Judy Ruliani and it stuck because when you spend your time lying about elections and defaming election workers to the point that they have death threats and can’t even leave their homes… well I’m just not going to take you seriously enough to get your name right.

Anyway, on Thursday, Judes reached a day with Ruby Freeman and Shaye Moss, the aforementioned election workers who risked their lives by speaking up against the lies being told against them, including by Rudy who showed videos of them working and said that they were stealing ballots in 2020.

As a reminder, the 2020 election was not stolen. Trump lost. He just never got a hug from his dad so instead of going quietly into that good night, he did insurrection and then Judes went in front of Four Seasons Landscaping while sweating hair dye.

2020 was so bad you guys.

These next four years are going to be so dangerous, so exhausting, and also… so dumb!

Like… he booked Four Seasons Landscaping, thinking he’d be speaking at the Four Seasons Hotel! And he still went out there, hair dye dripping down his face, to lie about an election.

History!

On Thursday he was supposed to go to court as a witness in a case that would decide the fate of things like his Florida condo and three Yankees World Series rings. He didn’t show up, which confused everyone for a couple minutes before we learned that a deal was struck between him and the election workers. It’s unclear how much money the women got in the settlement but let me tell you something… these women are much nicer than I am because I would have taken everything. Simply because this man has never once learned a lesson. So I would have taken it all, including his 1980 Lauren Bacall Mercedes (that’s literally one of his assets).

Also, he says that his world series rings are memories of his time as “New York’s No. 1 Yankee fan” which is simply untrue because Ashley Dylan Zazzarino, the voice of the tri-state area, is the number one Yankee fan and I just won’t allow this slander!

Voice of the Tri-State Area

Speaking of the voice of the tri-state area – I forgot to mention the other day that she says Manhattan’s first-in-the-nation congestion pricing sucks.

So there we have it.

And that’s it. That’s the news.

No show on Monday, because it’s MLK Day.

I do want to say something about the Inauguration that’s also happening on Monday. I will not be covering it. If actual news breaks, I’ll talk about it but I’ve made my feelings very clear on the threat that this incoming presidency poses to our democracy. So he can have his little party, he can invite whoever he wants to sing… that’s the choice he made. That’s the choice the performers made.

I will save my energy and focus my attention on the future.

This country is better than this moment.

I’m proud of Los Angeles. I said it in Monday’s show and I’ll say it again… the way this city has come together has been heartening but unsurprising.

And because you are here, and with us… and just because it’s a fact… I’m proud of you.